Going To A Funeral Of Someone I Don T Know Reddit, The purpose of a funeral is to say goodbye, and to help deal with your mourning, but I'd literally just stand there like an NPC and wait till I can go home, because I feel no sadness for this person. You go to support the loved ones who are grieving. 9K votes, 111 comments. The obituary came out soon after, and it seems like the funeral is relatively public. You’re not the asshole for not wanting to go to a funeral of someone you don’t know. In my opinion you don't go to the funeral for the person who died, because they obviously don't care if you're there. If you think it's weird for you imagine how the people who lost the person they love feel. A funeral is a place for people that actually knew the deceased, it’s a place of mourning and clearly someone that’s never met the person isn’t going to have the same feeling. She's heartbroken. This will just make your grief and depression deeper and could spark an unending Why would you go to the funeral of someone you don't know. Don't attempt to justify your presence by insisting that you knew the deceased better than you did. The whole ritual may bring comfort and closure to those who weren't that close but Guide to good etiquette when you are attending funeral services, what to do with children and whether or not you should attend an ex-spouse's funeral. We explain everything to know about attending a funeral here. You should respect A friend asked me for some advice about how to speak at a funeral for someone you don’t know. Wondering whether to attend a funeral of someone you're not related to? There are three questions to ask. We don’t send formal invitations for funerals, it’s usually an ‘if you cared People grieve in their own ways. If they want to attend a funeral and show support to the person who’s died, then by all means do that. Had to We would like to show you a description here but the site won’t allow us. Learn how to manage complex emotions and decisions with We would like to show you a description here but the site won’t allow us. But I think your friend is more likely to remember the visitation vs the funeral. Don't go if you don't want to, the funeral is to say bye to the person, the wake is to chat about the good times with them or just chat to other people about anything who have also lost that person. To attend a funeral of someone you don't know is uncomfortable "I'm not comfortable attending". When someone we know dies, it is natural to want to attend the funeral to pay our respects, but sometimes attending a funeral isn’t possible or Some people are scared of seeing someone who has passed, nervous about seeing others grieve, nervous about seeing family you hate while you grieve but at the end of the day the person really This is completely normal for some people and you don't have to hit your kids over something as stupid as this even if it's a family member or friend who died, you don't need to hit them. I never encourage people either way when it comes to Funeral Visitation for someone you don’t know very well: Any Advice? I’m attending the visitation and funeral for my boyfriend’s brother’s best friend tonight and tomorrow. Funeral attendance etiquette offers guidance for who should attend a funeral. Her partner died, I work in a 50-person office and have seen this coworker about a dozen times, talked to him once. Honestly, I would go to this with your partner having never been to a funeral, because then you’ll have some idea of what is going on instead of being there for someone you’re close to in a high emotional Don't force yourself in to give them but usually funerals are organized in such a way that there is a good moment where everyone can express them. I'm going to a family funeral next week, We would like to show you a description here but the site won’t allow us. And I don't want the whole department to despise me for "not supporting right". The local funeral home calls me from time to time to lead a funeral for someone in the community who did not belong to a church, but their family I don’t think anyone would see going to a funeral as intrusive unless there’s a weird ulterior motive. You don't have to go to the funeral to say goodbye to your grandmother. Is it normal for people to want to go to a funeral of someone they don't know? I just find it odd that you'd want to sit there with people who are grieving and also celebrating the life of someone Basically the title. It's ok to go to a funeral even if you Would it be wrong for me to attend a few funerals in my parish even if I don’t know the person, so I can see what it is like? And of course, I would appreciate being able to go to Mass as well, since the If you are going to a funeral for someone you don't know, you might need some tips on how to behave respectfully. I have gone to funerals for people I never knew to support my friends who were going. Yes, funerals are for the living - but much of it is about the years afterwards when you want and need closure. That sort of thing happens to pastors occasionally. Sometimes people can't get off work. Some individuals may feel too sad to go to the funeral, may not I’m going to a funeral next week to support my friend, not a close friend, someone I know from my community, she is a lovely person. Point is; I've never met anyone that enjoys We would like to show you a description here but the site won’t allow us. If you didn't know the person who So recently one of my boyfriend's close friend passed away and he was invited to his funeral that will be happening soon. (Edit) a word We would like to show you a description here but the site won’t allow us. When someone is attending a funeral it Discover proper funeral etiquette for handling the death of estranged family members. For *** I initially, instinctively and stupidly thought 'have fun', then thought 'good luck' and now Knowing what to say to someone going to a funeral isn’t as easy as “don’t say this, just say that. Find guidance on how to support grieving Don't go, and don't let anyone make you feel badly for not wanting to attend. If you are ambivalent about going, and you don't - then a year from now you may have a You don't have to go because staying home and taking care of yourself is more important than a symbolic gesture. Read on. I can remember when my grandfather died, several of my friends came to be Is it normal for people to want to go to a funeral of someone they don't know? I just find it odd that you'd want to sit there with people who are grieving and also celebrating the life of someone Is it OK to go to a funeral of someone you don't know? As a general rule, everyone is welcome at a funeral and you don't need to wait for an invitation. In my experience, far more people This could just be a culture thing, but for the actual funeral, we dressed her with the funeral home people, did her makeup and nails, brushed her hair, and lowered her into a coffin. Ideally something that you know resonates with her the most "Don't worry I'm here for you, let's go. This includes those who didn't know the Having to take care of future funeral arrangements has been very difficult and I feel as though I can’t or won’t be able to attend his funeral. Going to the funeral of someone you don't know or don't know well to support loved ones is really normal. When it comes to young people, many times people go to the funeral even if they never knew them, just If you feel ready, but you don't have friends, let me know and I'll tell you how to deal with that. I can remember when my grandfather died, several of my friends came to be supportive to Should you go to a funeral if you don't know the deceased? As a general rule, if you feel like you want to attend the service and you've been invited, then you should attend. It’s complicated, but I don’t really fit into the family because I was born when my dad was I know sometimes the visitations feel more like parties and sometimes they are more somber. I called up my mom again and told her what Emma told me, and my mom said "You don't know why he did that. I personally cry at funerals, not for the deceased but for the people who have lost someone close. Now during a pandemic I don't blame ANYONE for not wanting to attend a large gathering. I don't know anything about his personal life, but he was with this office his entire life. Block her and all I know most funerals go something like this: -Meeting in the religious building or funeral home chapel -Speeches/music -Precession of the coffin to wherever it is going. Basically my question is, is it 'normal' to bring someone to help me through the funeral even though she never met the person before? She has said she doesnt mind not going if I would rather just be with Obviously I don't know the couple you're referring to, but some people genuinely just feel attending funerals is a sense of duty, even if they only met someone a handful of times. What many people don't realize is that going to a funeral isn't always about knowing the person that died and honoring them. But myself and DH only go to funerals of people we know pretty well. I don't think that going will make much difference in how I grieve, so I just wanted to Wondering whether to attend a funeral of someone you're not related to? There are three questions to ask. Don't try to think of the perfect thing to say, or the perfect way to say it, just be cool and friendly and solemn. But I want to support their spouse and pay my What To Say At A Funeral For Someone You Don't Know Funerals can be emotionally challenging, especially when the person who has passed They did message me directly to let me know that he was dying, and then let me know directly that he passed. Do it in a way that is meaningful to you (doing something you enjoyed doing together, listen to her favorite music or movies, go Exactly. You don't want to be that My mother in law wants to move in? My (31M) wife’s (32F) mother wants to move in with us. 35yr old Male if that makes a difference. And at the end of the day It's his choice who he wants to marry!" I always Learn about funeral attendance etiquette, who should attend, and considerations for missing a service. Those 1. Begin by connecting with family members, close friends, If if you don't know them well enough to know what they would like, use that as your guidance and just send a card without flowers (if you are moved to send a card). I used to live in a rural village and there were people there who went to EVERY funeral regardless of whether they knew the deceased or anybody else. If I Etiquette for missing a funeral If you know you’re going to miss a funeral and still want to support the family, the good news is that there’s plenty If you've never been to a funeral before and want to get familiar with the traditions and what to expect, read our in-depth funeral etiquette guide to You absolutely do not have to attend anyone's funeral unless you feel the need to say goodbye. . If you don’t feel comfortable doing this then you are not obliged to attend Thing is, I don't know funeral etiquette and even then, I have only met the man once and my girlfriends mum (whose dad I'm talking about) I've met twice, her husband once and the meeting didn't go that Tonight is the viewing and funeral. If I go, I won't know anyone there/I'll be Speaking towards a traditional American funeral funeral the most part, expect it to be kind of a more casual conversation social gathering kind of thing. One of the most pivotal steps in preparing to speak for someone you don’t know is research. I feel weird about going to the funeral because I don't know their family and "real" friends. You will sometimes hear the stories make it pretty clear where the person is spending Knowing what to say to someone going to a funeral may seem difficult at first but it doesn’t have to be. Generally, most funerals have the viewing which is Funerals do nothing that the deceased is going to be aware of and are just a ritualised way for people to deal with their loss. Even if you didn’t know the person who has died well, you are honoring his or her memory by taking the time to pay your respects. ” Sometimes it’s about simply being present, offering quiet support, We would like to show you a description here but the site won’t allow us. I won't go to funerals because that's not the way I want to remember anyone. If you are going to a funeral for someone you don't know, you might need some tips on how to behave respectfully. People will find out. My boyfriend asked me if I could come with him to the funeral and I said yes if he I don't know if that'll be somewhat comforting or a nuisance because it's another person she'll have to deal with. Amethysts are traditional POST-funeral mourning stones from the Victorian age, but like, if you've got a pair of small amethyst studs I messaged the other child (she's my age) because I also see her during Thanksgiving to give my condolences, and she asked if I was going to the funeral. true Can confirm. We are having my mom's funeral today, 6 months after she died. If getting to the funeral or memorial service would be fairly easy for you but you don’t feel close enough to the family or the person who died to attend, you can If you don't want to go to a family member's funeral, think about your reasons why. The Hi! My friend is going to a funeral soon and I want to message her with "Hey, I know the funeral is today, ***". Now, while I haven’t seen or talked to this girl in 5 years, I still really appreciated and enjoyed her presence throughout my The purpose of a funeral is to mourn the deceased and show support for their family. For some people, attending the funeral of an estranged family member can help bring closure. Sounds like this woman has delusions of being your mother and probably thinks you should see her dad as a grandfather. We would like to show you a description here but the site won’t allow us. But if I won't go to the funeral, people will And, if you're nearby, drop off a homemade meal or dish to the family along with your note (cheesy funeral potatoes are always appreciated). It can also be an opportunity to say goodbye in a way that feels Don’t assume anything about the deceased’s spiritual life. That can be first in church or at the cemetary after the No. Don't isolate yourself. My wife bought a single wide for her and her mother, 3 brothers all younger and sister, younger too back We would like to show you a description here but the site won’t allow us. ", if you knew her dad and liked him tell her that and that is an honor/you are grateful that she invited you Funeral etiquette can be tricky for people who are new to the ceremony and norms. Many times it's about supporting those that knew them and supporting them Pearls in particular are traditional to wear to funerals in the West. We weren't that close. But you’re kind of in asshole territory for not going to support your husband. However, by centering your words Some people don’t do well with death and prefer to remember the deceased with memories of them living and thriving, not laid out in a box. From deathbed visits to funeral services and estranged relationships, here’s a warm, practical etiquette guide for supporting others through grief and loss. You know her and she told you about her son, that sounds like enough to me. That’s an invitation - I don’t know what your husband is expecting, but telling someone the time, date and location is an invite. I can remember a few times speaking at a People have sanitized the death process to the point of one day a loved one is here, and the next, they've taken them away, and we don't see them again. That's a bit of a generalisation I know. Everyone deals with grief in their own way and if you don't want to attend the Here is my dilemma: social convention has it that you should attend a close one's funeral, but what if you don't want to? The thought of saying the “right” thing at a funeral when you don’t deeply know the person can feel intimidating. I was going to skip a funeral once Not because I didn't care, but because there was a 3 day celebration of life culminating in a visit to the graveyard. If they don’t want to come because they think funerals aren’t there I'm a fairly new worker there (about 9 months), and not know everyone very well. If you're undecided about attending a funeral, learning the commonly-accepted etiquette for funeral Do you feel even worse knowing you don't feel bad because, after all, you didn't even know the guy? Today we are exploring how to decide whether or not to attend the funeral of Going to the funeral of someone you don't know or don't know well to support loved ones is really normal.

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